In this New Line sketch from The Dinner Theatre Rejects, a man takes his date to a haunted house… but he’s clearly not ready to face what’s inside. Determined to appear brave, he buys himself time with a series of overconfident stalling techniques: from suggesting where she should stand to “protect” him, to setting up a safe word, and even double-checking imaginary logistics.

Each new line escalates the absurdity while keeping his cool guy act barely intact. It’s a hilarious mix of bravado, fear, and slow-motion panic — all delivered one beat at a time.